You know how, when you’re a kid growing up, you promise yourself that there are certain things you’re never going to be? And then you end up being exactly what you didn’t want to be?I think I’m making the final move towards being what I didn’t want to be. I have become Mrs. Crankypants. Allow me to add a picture of what I’m feeling like lately.
Tag Archive: aging
I hate my pubic hair. I hate my lack of pubic hair. I don’t know what to do with my pubic hair. As of yesterday, I was letting it grow. Today I shaved it off like a porn star. (I suppose they wax though. Owwie. So not happening here. I have my eyebrows waxed and that’s painful enough. I can’t imagine someone ripping all the hair out “down there”. That would also mean exposing someone else to my vag, which I can’t imagine doing either.)
My husband uttered these seemingly innocent words to me the other night. He said something along the lines of “but you look good for your age”. Why don’t I just look good? What does my age have to do with it? As soon as the words were out of his mouth I envisioned myself ripping off his head his shoulders and shoving it up his ass.
Moving through life is like taking a vacation from work or school. You start off thinking “a week is such a long time, I’ll be able to do so much.” Then it’s Sunday and you’re thinking “wtf? Where did the time go?” That is how I feel about life.
The last time I looked forward to my birthday was my 21st birthday. Every birthday after was meh. At 21 you become an adult and can do pretty much everything (i.e. drink legally) except become president of the US and I don’t think that’s on most people’s priority list. So every birthday after that was no big deal.
Until I hit 25.
